Having the desire to be social and getting out there and getting a social life are two different things. Many people get stuck in the wishing and hoping phase. Daydreaming of a full and busy social calendar filled with dynamic people and things to do. In order to get the happier and healthier social life you want, you’ve got to put in the effort, but you may not know where to begin. Begin by asking yourself two foundational questions:
- Who do you want to be around when you’re being social?
- What do you want to be doing when you’re being social?
- Who do you want to be around when you’re being social?
All things healthy and created equal, who would you like to spend your time with while you are socializing? There may be an urge deep inside to change your social circle and be around a different group of people than who you’ve spent time with in the past. In some ways, you may be ready to move on and make new friends. It’s time to be honest with yourself about who you want to spend time with and get serious about developing new friendships or foster the ones you already have.
Once you’ve determined what type of people you want to spend time with, don’t let anything stop you from going after new relationships. It might take effort to make some new friends or reach out to people you haven’t connected with in a while. Don’t be intimidated or scared to approach people. Most everyone loves to meet new people.
What do you want to be doing when you’re being social?
Now that you’ve thought about who you’d like to be around, what do you want to be doing? Thinking about what activities you’d like to engage in when you are being social can help you prioritize them and go after them. If there is something you’ve always wanted to try, now’s the time. If you miss doing something you used to do but stopped because life got hectic, add that to your list.
After determining who you want to spend time with- literal people or types of people, and what you want to be doing, all that’s left is planning and taking action. Once you have a clear answer for the two main questions it’s just a matter of figuring out what opportunities are in your area and what steps you need to take to start having some fun. It might feel out of the box taking big, bold action, but it will be completely worth it when you start enjoying your new happy and healthy social life.
