Ah, comparison- it’s considered a thief of joy. That’s because comparing ourselves to others usually ends up one of two ways- inflating or deflating our ego. Comparison most always includes a false sense of reality. Generally, speaking when we feel inadequate to someone else, we are comparing our worst to their best. When we feel overconfident, we are comparing our best to their worst. Neither extreme is a correct representation of the truth.
There are plenty of reasons to stop comparing yourself with others, and these are at the top of the list.
You Aren’t Always the Best
We are all great at some things, but not all things. When we compare ourselves to others and think we are superior we deny the fact that we have weaknesses and open the door to be humbled by life. Sure, when you are competing it’s important to believe in yourself and expect to win, but there is more to confidence than a competitive mindset. Being overconfident and comparing ourselves to others can create a false sense of superiority which can be a turn off professionally and personally.
Realizing that we aren’t the best at everything can help keep us humble when we outshine others. Keep things real and enjoy what you’re best at without letting it go to your head.
You aren’t Always the Worst
While you aren’t always the best in the room, you also aren’t always the worst. Most people who compare themselves to others tend to compare up. Meaning, they compare themselves to people who seem better at something than they are. They filter others through a rosy lens that makes other people look superior. This can trigger feelings of inadequacy and crush spirits.
Social media is a perfect example of how people use comparison to amplify someone else’s strengths and diminish their own. It’s important to realize what you see is a highly curated image of life and doesn’t truly reflect the good, bad, and the often times ugly of it all.
Comparison is Emotionally Driven
When we compare ourselves, we are operating out of emotion rather than intellect. Emotions can’t always be trusted. Our emotions change like the wind and can be easily manipulated. Basing a judgement of worth and value on how we feel when we compare ourselves has little value. Under good circumstances, we may feel differently and more confident when making a comparison. Under poor circumstances, we may feel less confident.
Comparison driven by emotion has no benefit since it could be false. Remember the acronym for fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. Many times, the assumptions and comparisons we make with emotions have no factual basis.
Is There Ever A Time for Comparison?
Comparison can be a beneficial tool when used wisely. Under the right circumstances, comparison can offer constructive feedback. Witnessing and admiring something about someone else can encourage and motivate. Seeing someone succeed can give you the initiative and roadmap to follow. There’s a big difference between comparing and admiring. Be sure to take stock of what your reactions are and what is motivating you when you find yourself comparing your life to someone else’s.
