One of the most devastating feelings is giving something your all and it fails. The feelings of losing despite trying so hard can really twist your insides and make you feel like a failure. There are times when, despite your best effort, the desired outcome doesn’t or can’t happen. That’s tough to swallow but it’s true.
It’s important to understand that you can be brave and still fail. Being brave isn’t just about winning. Bravery isn’t contingent on getting the desired outcome. It’s simply being willing to show up and do the best you can in the worst of situations. It’s about taking that deep breath and forging ahead when you’d rather stay in bed with the covers over your head.
There are times when no amount of bravery is going to change the outcome. There’s no shame in failing and there’s nothing about you that made it happen. It doesn’t diminish how brave you are or how much effort you put into the situation. Here are a few examples of why you can be brave and still fail:
- You did your part and someone else didn’t
- There were extenuating circumstances beyond your control
- There may not be enough resources for your preferred outcome
All you can do, is all you can do – In some cases, your contribution to a difficult situation is part of a team effort. Perhaps you did your part and someone else didn’t resulting in a failure. You can’t absorb the brunt of the failure when you did all you could do. Be confident in your role and accept the recognition you deserve for your part. In some cases, all you can do is all you can do and despite your best efforts, things failed.
Some things are simply out of your control – In the same way that all you can do, is all you can do. Some things are just out of your control. Sometimes there are medical events that you can’t change for yourself and those you love. Sometimes you can’t prevent being fired or facing a financial setback. Some things are just out of your control and part of being brave is living with and allowing for things to play out the way they do.
There may not be adequate resources for success – Sometimes things are too big for the resources needed for success. Running out of resources isn’t a failure. Sometimes it’s just a fact. Doing the best you can with the resources you have without giving up until you must, is and example being brave.
It feels awful to fail. No one is denying it, but you can be brave and still fail. Facing your fears and tackling the situation is worthy of praise. If your situation didn’t end favorably, it doesn’t mean you weren’t brave enough, it means you did the best you could with what you had.
