People are living longer than ever, and it is very common for adults to be parenting their own children as well as beginning to care for aging parents. This is a tough spot for everyone as well as a time for joy and fun.
Getting older has its advantages and disadvantages. No one can deny the fun that comes with retirement and being able to do what you want, when you want. There are many things that make the second half of life more ideal than the first. However, there are certain realities that must be faced because… We ain’t getting any younger.
If you are helping your parents or will be expected to support them as they get older, it serves both of you to have an understanding about what everyone should expect. Discussing a broad range of the aspects of aging can help everyone make better decisions as time goes on. Waiting until you’re faced with important issues can magnify them and make their impact harder than it has to be. Making decisions while your parents can actively participate is ideal. Here are some key ways you and your parents can cope with getting older:
Have important conversations – From end-of-life wishes to healthcare and living arrangements, there are important conversations everyone needs to have. Some elements of aging include difficult health issues, like memory loss or incapacity. It is vital to have important conversations with aging parents while they can share their thoughts about their healthcare and living situation. Knowing what their wishes are and ensuring there are finances to go along helps families create a plan and stick to it when the time comes.
Get the right documents – An advanced directive, will, trust, and other documents makes legal work easier. Being able to consent for medical care or manage finances on behalf of your parents gives everyone peace of mind when there is a shift in health.
Settle affairs ahead of time – Encourage your parents to settle their affairs so you won’t have to. Making end-of-life preparations and paying for funeral costs is easier than ever. This takes the financial burden off adult children and gives parents the ability to choose how they will be taken care of during their end of life. Helping parents get their finances in place, including how to access important accounts is vital. They do not have to give you their passwords or access to their information but should designate an attorney or financial planner to help if/when they need to.
Keep things out in the open – Aging is part of life. Keeping things out in the open is the best policy. Avoiding tough conversations won’t make things easier. Keep a culture of transparency and authenticity with your parents. Encourage them to live life to the fullest and that you will be part of the solution if anything comes up that they need you for. Giving parents dignity and support helps them feel empowered, safe, and loved as they grow older.
“Growing older is a privilege denied to many” -unknown. Getting older is a mixture of wonder and uncertainty. Being prepared for many of the issues of aging is a great way to manage the changes that come with the territory and ensure families are safe and ready.
