From the cradle to the grave we have an innate need to be social. Engaging with others and feeling a part of a community is important for our development, mental and physical health. When we are born, our parents and family have a major impact on our lives. Their loving care become the building blocks for a strong social foundation. Over time, more and more people influence our social life.
These influences can enhance or diminish our experiences socially and shape how healthy and happy our social lives are. Here are some of the typical influencers that shape our social life:
- Parents
- Siblings or close-contact relatives
- Teachers
- Coaches
- Care providers
Parents – Our parents are the primary source of social influence throughout our childhood and into adulthood. How they care for us and the modeling they do to encourage a healthy and happy social life makes an important impact.
Siblings and close relatives – Our siblings and those relatives closest to us create an extension of the impact our parents have. Generally speaking, our families have similar morals and values and the consistent messages really influence our beliefs. This includes how we socialize.
Teachers – Often times teachers are the first major influencers in our lives outside of our parents. Depending on when you begin school, the impact can start as early as pre-school. Teachers are a wonderful resource for intentionally teaching social skills through specific lesson plans as well as passively by modeling behaviors in the classroom.
Coaches – Like teachers, coaches have an important impact on our social lives. If you play team sports, being social can be competitive and having good experiences helps. Good coaches can instill the right beliefs and skill sets to make being social easier and more fun.
Care providers – Whether we spend time with family, in care centers, or after school care, care providers can make a big impact on our social skills when we are young. Care providers are often a combination of nurturing adult, teacher, and friend. Their unique relationship to us as a child can really support our social growth.
As a child, there are many people who help shape our social development. As with anything there may be one who stands out in very positive ways while another stands out in negative ways. As an adult you can discern between who was a great influence and who wasn’t and take the good and leave the bad behind. Either way, how you experience your social life is directly tied to the influences in your life as you were growing up.
